Tuesday 31st October 2023
Halloween. Yey!
I woke up feeling a lot better and less achey than yesterday so I was happy. I had a client from Australia first thing and then I was ready for the day. The weather was gray but dry, so I decided to go for a walk. Being Halloween, the idea of walking through the cemetery appealed to me, after all there's so much talk of the dead and ghosts, so I headed out.
The nearby park looks very different to the lush days of May but it didn't deter the plenty of dog walkers from doing their thing. The dry stream bed is now in full flow and I'm still amazed at how green the lawn stays. There were large puddles of water damming up at path corners and a lot fewer birds but it's still a lovely park with all the autumn colours.
I walked through the cemetery admiring the trees and paths this time, more than the headstones. But I did see a couple of interesting stories. It still intrigues me that in a hundred years there's going to be no stone inscription of my name, yet these souls from 1901 might still be visible.
Although all these graves belong to strangers, it somehow links to the collective space of grief, where I once spent a lot of time. For me now, cemeteries are a strange place of comfort. The certainty of death is written in stone with declarations of love by the survivors. My mum is buried thousands of miles away with the ashes of my sister and Dad sprinkled in the soil. I seldom visit that grave, so perhaps my interest in cemeteries is a place of connection to her too. Her loss was my first brutal encounter with grief. That loss triggered a hunger for life, for living my days to the fullest and making sure I have no regrets.
I'm glad to say that I have very few regrets, other than I didn't spend enough time with my mum when she was alive. I was too busy growing up, trying to be adult, with the illusion that she'd be around forever. I make a point now of contacting people when I think of them. I'm fortunate to have wonderful people in my life and I love the ease of communicating now, with the internet.
I've so enjoyed seeing the Halloween decorations and seeing how people dress up. Kids came to the door and my brother in law was prepared, with a big bowl of treats. I haven't experienced a British Halloween in this way since I was a kid. Bobbing for candy apples, monkey nuts and sweets are some of the things that I can vaguely remember. Celebrations of old style feasts and festivals, when communities needed each other more and smart phones were a thing of the distant future. Of course, I'm partial to the dressing up and costumes giving me a chance to pretend I'm someone else for a moment. I didn't dress up today however, but I did enjoy seeing the creativity of others.
I love celebrating being alive. Tomorrow is All Saints Day, yet another day to celebrate.
The Google video is cute too. Click on it if you dare!
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