Directions

Once upon a 30 year old me, I was too scared to go different routes. I would drive or walk the same way, all the time. My anxiety at getting lost was enormous. Plus I always felt that I needed to get to the destination as soon as possible. The roses remained unsmelled, and dogs remained unpatted.

Now, I sometimes feel a tremor of that anxiety but it no longer keeps me hostage in fear.

Three things are responsible for changing that particular fear.

1. My inner work -in particular-tapping

2. Running

3. Cellphones with maps

I now relish new roads where I can see different houses, dogs or hidden secret gardens.

Today I drove through different roads to get to my destination and I was 11 minutes late. I am never late. Well, I used to never be late. My anxiety didn't rise to extreme levels and I apologised appropriately but no longer the anxious 'apologising profusely'.

My life has less definite specific direction but I do know that I am headed to the sea.