Friday 3rd November 2023
Waking up to sunshine sometimes just makes life feel easier, even if it's rather chilly. In spite of it still being pitch dark at 6am, I'm waking up and listen for the birds. I was thinking back today on my 'original' gap year when I was 21 and how different I feel now as a 39 year old (ahem.) Okay add a few decades....
But the first time around I got depression in a big way. I didn't recognise it like I would now, but it was certainly depression and I feel so sorry for having caused my late sister so much worry and concern. My living with her, must have made her life a misery as I certainly didn't have this sunshiney disposition of nowadays, back then. I don't have many regrets but that period of my life wasn't my best and I did try and make it up to her later. I'm conscious now of having blue moments, or sad times but I have tools (and friends) to help me now.
My years of running have also altered my neural pathways and outlook. I want to be the best version of myself in every way that I can be. Sometimes I'm the best slothlike version binge watching series, and other times, I'm charging around a badminton court feeling groovy. Today I had a great time again in a sports centre working up a sweat, growling at my 'fresh-air' shots and working out how to 'place' the shuttle differently. It's a great game and I love it.
The skies were happy on the road back too, so I'm a happy woman tonight, albeit still a little stiff.
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